Trust me! The man wanted to donate

COMMENT | The khalwat squad caught me in a car with a man. They shone a torch through the window, demanded that I roll it down, and asked me why there was a man in my car.

So, I told them that I could not find a parking spot.

They pointed to an empty car park behind me, so I explained that I could not walk, because I had a knee problem. I pointed to my walking stick on the back seat.

The religious officers looked at one another, stroked their goatees, turned their backs to me, then after a few seconds of consultation, gave me the all clear.

They agreed that the walking stick was proof I could not walk. I breathed a sigh of relief. I thought that they would make me walk in a straight line, for 10 metres, like the test that police use when they suspect a driver is drunk.

While they were deliberating over me, I feared the worst. I thought they would charge me with close proximity, or for fabricating stories about donations from Arab princes.

I did not want to be punished with six strokes of the rotan, like the two women who were found naked in a carpark in Terengganu, holding a variety of "shower heads", KY jelly and "special glass beads".